Tuesday, August 2, 2011

Reverse Life Cycle for Moms

There is a quote by a man named Robert Benson called The Life Cycle and I've seen it floating around the internet for quite a few years. This probably means you all have seen it already also but in case you haven't...drum roll please...

“I think that the life cycle is all backwards. You should die first, get that out of the way, then live twenty years in an old age home. You get kicked out when you’re too young, you get a gold watch, you go to work. You work forty years until you’re young enough to enjoy your retirement. You go to college until you’re ready for high school. You go to grade school, you become a little child, you play, you have no responsibilities, You become a little baby, you go back into the womb, you spend your last nine months floating, and you finish off as a gleam in someone’s eye!”

I thought this was quite amusing the first time I read it, probably 10 or 15 odd years ago. It still gives me a little chuckle but it occurred to me today that it was lacking a little in relatability to my own personal life. I spent most of today making phone calls and jumping through hoops and doing laps in preparation for jumping others in reference to my kids' various healthcare needs. I was feeling ever so slightly (intensely) exasperated by the fact that moms don't receive training for this stuff. I know that the idea that there isn't a manual is not original but I guess what I was really thinking about was a mommy internship. 

So here's my take on Benson's idea.

Reverse Life Cycle for Moms

“I think that the life cycle is all backward. You should die first, get that out of the way, then live twenty years in an old age home. You get kicked out when you’re too young, you celebrate 50 years of marriage. You receive diamond earrings from your husband, endless praise from your adoring children and go on a trip to Italy. You watch your grandchildren being raised until you know enough to raise your own children. Now you get a diamond ring to go with your earrings. You go to college until you’re ready for high school. You go to grade school, become a little child, you play, you have no responsibilities. You become a little baby, you go back into the womb, you spend your last nine months floating, and you finish off as a gleam in someone’s eye!”

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