How I Roll

Last week I took my boys on a flight to Kansas City. I've actually flown alone (no other adults) with my kids several times in the past few years and I've got the procedure down pretty well, I think. When I saw a post on myautismteam.com asking about taking a 3 year old on a plane trip (and whether or not it's worth it to bring a car seat along), I found myself composing quite a lengthy response. Once I hit the 5th paragraph, I decided it might be more efficient to turn that comment into a blog post and just link to it on myaustimteam. So here it is!

I would absolutely recommend bringing a car seat for your 3 year old on a plane. For one thing, the familiarity and a feeling of security help a lot (this is especially true for children with Autism). And, at least for my son, who is very small for his age, the lap-only belt on the plane seat wouldn't do a ding dang thing to hold him in place, whether the cause of sudden movement was hyperactivity or turbulence.

First thing to do if you're going to bring her car seat is find the notice on the car seat that says it's certified for use in motor vehicles and aircraft. Make a mental note where that sticker is located because there is a chance you will encounter a snotty flight attendant who will try to tell you that you can't use a car seat on an airplane. Then you can politely tell her that yes, yes, you can, because there is a law saying qualified car seats must be allowed and here's the sticker saying this particular seat qualifies.

Since I occasionally (more often than not) travel alone with my kids it would be physically impossible for me to carry a car seat in addition to holding onto my two boys AND carry-on bags. So, I bring a regular stroller with me and I use the toddler car seat's "latch" straps to hang it off the back of the stroller. This is not for a child to ride in, it is just to carry the car seat through the airport. Most airlines allow you to check a stroller at the gate at no additional cost and you'll get it back as soon as you get off the plane. You will have to unlatch the car seat at security and put it and the stroller on the belt for the x-ray scanner with everything else. (Side tip: The weight of the car seat *will* tip the stroller over if the stroller is empty, so unlatch the car seat before trying to take your child out if you want to avoid embarrassment and frustration.) 

I also accept help whenever I can get it. If someone notices that I'm struggling at the bottom of the gangway, juggling two small kids (one who doesn't want to get out of the stroller and one squirming to get down off my hip), a car seat, a back pack and a huge diaper bag, and offers to carry something on board the plane, I let them. If no one offers, I ask a flight attendant. It sounds like you'll have adult help already and I would advise you to depend on them. 

Whether I bring a car seat or not, if I'm traveling with kids, I bring the standard boredom busters and snacks. (Playing movies on our iPad allows me freedom our fore-mothers couldn't even dream of.) Of course, I give myself extra time to get through security and I don't even attempt to be the first person off the plane. If I'm not in a rush I'm almost guaranteed to work more efficiently and therefore, in the end, more quickly. It also helps my kids' tantrums not to escalate as quickly if I make a conscious choice to be calm and nonchalant. This last trip I was literally the last person off because I waited patiently for everyone else to make room for the flight attendants to get to me and carry the things I didn't have hands for. 

I may be the nightmare of the business man who is used to booking it through security (Hi, Dad! ☺) but this is what works best for me and my boys. If I'm holding you up, Mr. Late For His Flight, offer to fold my stroller for me and be grateful that Alexander is the one having the meltdown because MY meltdowns aren't as sweet.